Friday, September 23, 2005

Flashback Friday

Friday afternoon. School's out for the week. I'm beat.

Today I brought the PlayStation into work with all the Karaoke Revolution stuff. My students absolutely love it, and, I must add, so do I. I actually have a kid who came in last year at a second grade reading level; he was completely down with the Karaoke--but was pissed that he couldn't read well enough to keep up with the words. I called his proctor mom (like foster--but more temporary and for kids with more "issues") and told her that I thought he would really benefit from having the game to play at home. She bought it for him--and he has jumped 3 grade levels in his reading.

When people ask me what I would do if I didn't teach, I always tell them, "Be a rock star." They laugh because they think I'm kidding, but I'm not. I love to sing. I love the spotlight. So much so that I make a conscious effort to reign myself in at parties or other places where I could conceivably become an annoying attention hog.

This brings me to the "flash back" in "Flashback Friday." Today I'll flash-back to when I was 17--and just graduated from high school. I got a phone call inviting me to participate in the Miss Iron County Pageant. Don't think less of me or hate me for it--but I did it. The superstar in me just couldn't pass it up.

12ish other girls and I all strutted our stuff in evening gowns, swimsuits (for the "physical fitness" part of the competition) did an interview, bla bla bla. The reason I did it was for the talent contest. I told my mom (much to her dismay) that my only goal for the competition was to, umm, stimulate every guy in the audience when I sang. The song I chose was "Ain't Misbehavin'" and I must say I totally nailed it. I wore this long skinny midnight blue velvet dress and talked my mom into elbow length gloves to match. Mandy choreographed my "moves" and had me coquettishly strutting up and down the runway and pointing suggestively at the audience. By the end of the song, people were standing up and whistling.

Interestingly enough, my future husband was there (with his then girlfriend and Janzen's mom) and claims that that performance is what led him to contact me several months later.

Of course, I didn't win. I did take the prize for best interview, best community service proposal, and best talent, but my blood wasn't blue enough for the long time Cedar City judges. Good thing to, because at the time, I was exploring my, umm, hippie tendencies, and wouldn't have been able to put up with all the prissy shit that went along with the, umm, crown.

After the pageant, I went home, washed my face, combed all the goo out of my hair and put it in a pony tale and went out with some friends to have chili-cheese fries at JB's.

Ok. That was totally an Uncle Rico moment. Sorry. At least I'm not offering to show the video, I guess.

If Sophie ever wants to do a pageant, I think I may have to be a TOTAL hypocrite and tell her no fucking way. They're too expensive (some girls spent literally thousands on dresses, swimming suits, make-up, etc.), and like it or not, they're all fixed in one way or another. If she wants a place to shine, I'll find her a talent competition or open mike night (if she's a singin' fool like her mama), but no--no pageants for my Sophie.

Today's best thing about being a mom:
Sophie wakes up in a great mood every day. Lately when she gets up, what she wants to do is DANCE! I put in a movie for her, and try to wake up, and meanwhile, she's bouncing around, shaking that thang, yelling, "Come on Mom! Come dance to the beat!"

Today's worst thing about being a mom:
Sophie just now said to me, "I'm trying to get some milk from my cow!" I looked over and she was tugging on Jimmy's weiner.


lonna said...

Oh my, poor Jimmy.

What a great story. Good for you for winning in the important categories. Pageants freak me out. Like it's not bad enough that men objectify women without us asking for it. I'm even more disturbed by little girl pageants. Little girls are so cute already. Look at Sophie. She needs nothing to be just heart-meltingly gorgeous, but they put fake eye lashes on these girls, make up, and tons of hairspray. They look like baby hookers. What are we teaching these girls about their value in society. On the other hand, if an older child chooses to go that route, that's their business. It's not my thing, but live and let live.

Missuz J said...

I also think the little girl pageants are down right freaky. Eww.

rob said...


You're killin' me, Smalls.

Rather, Sophie is.

That girl makes my uterus hurt.

Jen said...

That is a great story. My favorite part is that Erik was there! Do you have pictures from the pageant.

Keep Sophie away from that weiner!

patrice said...

is jimmy, um, neutered?

I love karaoke, too, but I get so shy when it's time to actually go up there and sing. unless it's just in front of my friends and family (which it never is) and then I'm sure I'd be okay. but at a bar? I get freaked out.

NME said...

The karaoke idea is BRILLIAMT. You are seriously a stellar teacher. The kind of learning that sneaks up on kids is the best.

HA! Did you keep your pagaent sash? I think you SO need to post pictures from then.

NME said...

Oh - and as a first rate teacher maybe you can teach me to spell brilliant correctly on the first try.

Kodi said...

Milking my cow, hahahahaha. That Soph is too much. Thanks for letting me hang with you guys today. I need you to kick me in the balls and tell me to leave my house every now and then.