Very shortly, E and I are on our way to Vegas for a rendezvous with some old friends. We're going to be gone for less than 24 hours, and Katester the Greatster is staying over with Soph--but still, still, still I worry. I feel guilty. I'm scared something will go terribly wrong. So much of what you give up as a mother is the ability to just have no strings attached.
I've been missing Soph like crazy anyway lately. I hate waking up every single morning and rushing out the door to work before getting to spend any time with her. I miss lazing on the couch with her, watching Sesame Street, fixing her hair, scrambling eggs, poking along through a "Mom and Sophie Day." These days I get up, rush to get myself ready, hurry and do her hair, (Why is it that men just don't have the hair doing gene? Are barrettes and pony tails really that tricky?) snuggle her on the couch for about 2 minutes, and head out the door. I'm SUPPOSED to be at work by 7:30. I rarely make it before 7:40. Sheesh.
Usually on my short days, I pick her up from school, and we go out to lunch. Expensive, yes, but it's a nice treat for both of us. Yesterday, she wanted dumplings, so we headed to the Hunan. Soph is super impressed with the golden (spray painted) dragons and other assorted plastic Chinese decor. The only way to get dumplings there is to order this huge bowl of soup, so I fish out the dumplings and put them on a plate for her, and eat the rest myself. She, of course, must eat with chopsticks, and ends up with half of her lunch in her lap. Then, the climax--the letter cookies. I don't think she quite gets the idea of a fortune, but loves to open them and pass out the letters.
So I have this huge tension headache, and am being pretty grouchy to E. It's time to take a deep breath, buck up, and fucking have a good time all ready. For some reason, that kind of sounds like a lot of work.
Today's best thing about being a mom:
I just love her. So much.
Today's worst thing about being a mom: