"I'm skating on my Sprite!" Sophie just announced this to me. It amazes me the things that she thinks are ok--things that she just tells me thinking that I'll totally be on board. Just now, she spilled Sprite, on purpose, on the kitchen floor, and was sliding around on it. I honestly think she assumed that I'd say something like, "What a good idea!" and join her.
Yesterday while eating dinner, she yelled at me from her high chair (in front of the tv. Yes, I am the world's worst mother.) "Mom! I'm making soup!" What she was doing was sucking the juice out of her sippy cup and spitting it into her tortellini. Again, when I firmly told her (yelled at her) to STOP SPITTING ON HER FOOD she looked at me all hurt, like I should have instead asked her for a bite. Sigh.
There are many such stories. Sophie thinks that the toilet and toilet paper are recreational. The other day I caught her standing on her stool, dipping her foot in the toilet. She looked at me and smiled, and said, "Brrr. It's cold!" Christ Almighty. So we had a talk about germs and poop and NOT PUTTING BODY PARTS IN THE TOILET! Then just moments ago, sitting on the toilet to pee (the potty training is going slowly but surely) she lowered her butt into the water, on purpose, and again informed me how cold the water was. Fuck it. Maybe we'll just have to install a bidet.
I'm too sad about Mandy going home to write about her or her trip. Maybe tomorrow.
Today's best thing about being a mom:
Obviously, I'm rarely at a loss for amusing anecdotes.
Today's worst thing about being a mom: