Tuesday, April 12, 2005

Day Care

As a working mom, so far I've been lucky and enough relatives and friends have been willing to help out that Sophie hasn't had to go to day care. Until now. I am absolutely scared to death, although I think I found a really good one. In fact, after our first visit a month or so ago, Sophie would come into my room at 6:00 am with her little back pack on and demand, "Get out of bed and take me to school!" I've been putting off actually enrolling her for several weeks by having a friend or two help out, but that's getting ridiculous. Day care it must be.

So I found one in my small town that isn't a giant kid holding pen/warehouse. In fact, it's a day care and preschool and private school. Yea. It's expensive as hell. But even so, I'm scared shitless. There are many reasons for this. While out of my sight she could be stolen, molested, hurt, or worse. In addition, she probably will have her feelings hurt or be ignored.

Because these things are just too painful to even consider, I'm falling back on selfishness, and worrying about what people will think about me. You see, because I'm the worst mother in the world, I let my two year old daughter have a bottle at nap time. This is like the biggest no no of all pediactrics. No bottles in bed. Ever. No bottles for two almost three year olds. So--will they let her have her bottle? And think I'm a terrible mother? Or will they say--no bottles for two year olds here, and break her little heart.

Also, Sophie is in the middle of a huge kitty obsession, and is LICKING everyone! I bet she's going to lick some poor kid right in the face, and his mom will call me and demand an explanation and I'll have to explain that actually, Sophie only licks people she really likes. Oh man. I hope hope hope hope hope hope the other kids will be nice to her and that she'll have fun and not think I abandoned her or freak out too much!

Today's best thing about being a mom:
Today I just love looking and Sophie and thinking that she's the most beautiful little girl in all of creation.

Today's worst thing about being a mom:
Entrusting your child's physical and emotional well being to near strangers is super awful. They don't know her like I do. They don't love her. They better be good to her or this mama is going on a rampage!


NME said...

I can imagine your fear - as I'm a paranoid nutcase who fears leaving her child with his grandmother! But two years old is a great age for daycare. She will be so excited to interact with the other kids. They grow up and as they do they will need us less and less. It's such a horrifying thought and yet nice too. And such is the paradox that is motherhood.

Jen O. said...

I am sure Sophie will encounter many kids at daycare who lick, sing, pinch, burp on demand, pull hair, giggle uncontrolably, wet their pants, stuff things up their noses and eat glue. If she were going to school with a bevy of 5th graders, I'd say you have reason to worry. But they're all around two years old, so they're all kind of like tiny drunken adults.

Obviously, I don't have any kids. But I do have drunken friends who lick, sing, pinch, burp on demand, pull hair, giggle uncontrolably, wet their pants, stuff things up their noses and eat glue.