Monday, August 22, 2005

Out of the mouth of Sophie

"I made a sucker!"
She said this to me, brandishing a very sticky and drippy majic wand, as I lay in the bath tub. I had decided to chance a bath--by myself--while she watched Angelina Ballerina. All was quiet, so I assumed all was well. Big mistake. While I was in the tub, she got into the refrigerator, took out the butterscotch syrup, squeezed it out onto a plate (thank god) and dipped her new sparkly magic wand in it.

"He got the ball!"
Naked Sophie squeezed one of her bouncy balls in her butt cheeks--apparently just seeing if she could. Jimmy decided this was a new and intriguing way to play catch. She was SUPER pissed at me for not letting her repeat this experiment.

"I made samwiches!"
She found some sunscreen laying around (thanks Erik) and squirted it all over her play food--squishing it together, and making, well, samwiches.

"I'm getting ready for the performance!"
This is what she said after I caught her painting her face with watercolors. I was 4 FEET AWAY, doing the dishes, again fooled by the relative quiet, thinking that for once, she was just playing with her watercolors, being good.

(Stretches up to the ceiling, fake yawning) "I had a nice nap!"
After fighting to get her to have a nap for 45 minutes--2 bathroom trips, 1 spanking, one head bonked on the headboard while having a tantrum,--I left Sophie's room, telling her that she was NOT to get out of her bed until she had had a nap. 30 seconds later, she came into the livingroom, and said the above.

p.s. All of these events took place in the past 2 days.

Today's best thing about being a mom:
Boredom? Never.

Today's worst thing about being a mom:
The mess "Du jour"


NME said...

Good lord. I think I might be haunted with the image of a dog biting a ball out of a little girls butt all the rest of my days. Thank the gods my mom doesn't remember all the embarassing things that I did - or at least doesn't tell me about them.

grody jo-dee said...

that is hilarious.....i have to say that i know now why my mom developed eyes in the back of her head. how else do you keep up? yes, even as they get older, the "quiet" you hear is never the good kind is it? :)

lonna said...

I just know that these are the kinds of things that I have to look forward to with Dermot. You know they're cute when you hear these stories about other's kids, but just terrible when you're dealing with them yourself.

Jen said...

Aw, that is cute. Never a dull moment with her, huh?

TD said...

Is a sucker then same as a lollipop?

Thanks for your comment and email address. I may have been a posting/commenting slacker, but I've been keeping abreast of Sophie's (and your) exploits daily...

Did you give her back the ball?

patrice said...

I love sophie. I think I'd even like to babysit her, just so I can have stories like this to tell. but I bet she wouldn't do any naking with a babysitter. I just have to hear it from you instead, I guess.

A Man without a Band said...

do you think the Coppertone girl had a ball in her butt? Good seeing you on Saturday. Glad you decided to share that story.

ta-da! My shortest comment ever!

KATIEmagic said...

Sophie is so cute! A friend of mine caught her 3 year old coloring on her walls and when she told him they had to clean it up he said. "But Mom, it's my ART." Seriously, that shit would probably have to stay on my walls.

thelyamhound said...

Imagine if we had that level of innovation and industry available to us given our current levels of knowledge and understanding of social and moral acceptability.

Toddlers have a potent ingenuity that defies our prosaic reason. It's what makes the genocidal Stewie from "The Family Guy" seem so apt a representation.

I think her assumption as to the impermanence of your memory is the really funny part, fabricating a nap only minutes after it had been made clear to you that none had taken place.

rob said...


Just imagine if she exclaimed, "I'm getting ready for the performance" during the ball in butt episode.

Katy said...

Patrice. That child will Nake for anybody.

On a side note my word verification is fkyndye. any thoughts on that matter?

Kodi said...

Soph is one clever girl. I kept her "pattern" of coasters on my table all day. Kiri thought it was quite smart. I loved how she was totally fine staying at my house while you took Jimmy home. I'm glad she is comfortable around me, and I certainly enjoy her company. The fishes have never been so well fed. Love ya.

the beige one said...

What is it about toddlers that allow them to get up to the most heinous activities and still manage to be so quiet about it?

Troublesome. Bothersome.