Tuesday, August 09, 2005

I am officially the worst mother in the world. I have yelled at Sophie all day. That child will not do one thing I ask her to do. I say, "Please get in your car seat" and she runs down the side walk. I say, "Please lay down for your nap" and she runs down the hall. I say "Please come here so I can change your pull-ups" and she sits down and plays with her toys. I'm so fucking tired of that kid not ever ever ever minding me. I don't know if I've just raised a total brat or what. Undoubtedly, it's all my fault. If I want her to do anything--anything at all, I have to start counting to three, and threaten to spank her, and actually spank her and I honestly don't think I want to be a mother anymore. I'm serious. I can't even type some of the awful stuff I've said to her today. Jesus Christ. Who ever ever in their right mind sent me this child? It's definitely enough to challenge one's belief in a benevolent god or goddess. Just now I literally threw her on her bed and slammed the door. I should be fucking arrested.

8 comments:

Kathryn said...

Sweety, everyone has those moments. You are FAR from a bad mother, that girl is lucky to have you. I'm sorry you're having such a challenging day. I wish I could help.

Kodi said...

Becca, Sophie is a normal 2-3 year old. I have said some terrible things to my daughter in her 13 years, things I regret to this day. But, she loves me anyway, and she knows I love her, and she is a great kid. You'll feel better in an hour or so when Sophie wakes up and wants to snuggle with you because she "missed you and missed you."

Jen said...

Sorry you are having a bad day, but I am really glad to see that you got all of your posts back!

amandak said...

Oh how I relate. That was totally me last week. It WILL pass. I'm not saying her behavior will miraculously change overnight or anything, but as parents, our tolerance for our children's misbehaving comes and goes. Give yourself a break, and leave her in her room for awhile so you can both calm down. She's just pushing your buttons because she's learned she can. Sometimes you will have to lay down the law and remind her who's boss. That doesn't mean you're a bad mother by a long shot. It just means you're a mother with boundaries, and that's a GOOD thing.

NME said...

Amanda is totally correct (and should have her own call in show). You need a break to refresh your tolerance. And Sophie's behavior is undoubtedly a developmental stage that you will both get through. Keep your chin up.

hazel said...

I keep a destroyed alarm clock under my side of the bed at all times as a reminder of one of the (many) times I lost my cool with trent. this was by far the most egregious, though, as I was so angry with him for not falling asleep hours and hours after his bedtime that I took his alarm clock and threw it at the wall right by his head. it broke and freaked both him and me out.

what I'm saying is what everyone else is saying. we all have those times. for me, when I get overwhelmed, I go to my room, shut the door, and take out that alarm clock and make myself calm down.

every mother has been there. and if they say they haven't, they are LYING.

KarmaCake said...

The one thing I learned as a nanny for the millions of children in my life is:

Take a deep breath.
Reassert yourself as the leader.

2 year olds don't often respond to reason.

Get down to their level, be firm.

Give a consequence if they don't comply.

Dominance through aggression breeds it into their social patterns.

Remember, you're an awesome parent with lots of love. I don't know you, but, just through your language I can tell you're a great person.

Buck up. No one's a brat, they're just a 2 year old!

Katy said...

E: All of the above. You are an amazing parent. Sophie is such a joy and treasure to be around and you KNOW how much she loves you. Just because you're both at the end of your rope today doesn't make you a bad mom or her a brat. You've had constant mommy/sophie time for the last three months. You're probably both just a little stir crazy. Call me if you want me to take her, or you. :)